and.......repeat. damn it!!

I curse like an Irish sailor. I admit it, with pride. So in my mission to eat whole foods and plant strong, my dinners have been anything but. I have to start my 30 days & 30 nights all over again. But that’s ok. I can do that if I want (my middle finger to anyone that has a damn issue with it. It’s not your fat ass trying to turn things around).  So I will confess my last 2 night’s dinner. The first would be a trip to KFC. Enough said. Last night was delivery from Nancy’s Pizza. Chicago style with bacon. So lets me just tell you that it was holy-shit-balls-damn-good. On the bright side I could only eat 1 piece and I was stuffed.  But it caused me to feel like hell and my blood sugar last night and this morning was not good at all. Grrrrrr.

I am sure that slice of pizza was the main cause of the horrid bike ride this morning. I had to walk a good bit of it because I kept getting dizzy and just felt funky. But I am going to see the cardiologist to make sure something isn’t seriously wrong. Because I can feel something is wrong and it is time to do the nuclear test on the ole ticker. Am I being paranoid because of my family history? You bet your ass. My dad and grandmother both had bypass surgery. My grandfather dies from complications of a heart attack when he was 62. My dad passed away when he was 63 due to his heart failing and he had his bypass surgery when he was only 45. Scared yet? You should be. Cause I am. I have been a type 1 diabetic for 30 years and that pretty much guarantees that I will have heart issue out the ass. So better safe than sorry. You would think all of this would scare me into a healthy eating pattern but obviously hasn’t. And that worries me even more. But I know my body and I can tell when something is off. I just want to feel normal again and have some piece of mind about my heart.

So I am back on track today, right now. Not tomorrow, not on Monday. I actually think a junk food addiction is a hell of a lot harder than any drug addiction. That includes meth. Even some of the basic foods you get from the grocery store are designed to make you want more and more.   

So that is my confession today. in case you are wondering......this is what falling off the wagon looks like.

Cheers & beers!!!

Who Moi?

So those of you that know me probably think of me as the “wild” one of the group. Now I know exactly how that came about, oh yes. I had enough piercings and tattoos to make a biker cringe by the time I was 21. And some of you were even there for that awesome event. I really make a special effort to stay out of trouble. Some of the wing nuts I used to hang around were quite the opposite though. I don’t encourage piercings or tattoos, and never really did. When people would ask about mine I would usually advise against it. I would never EVER advocate getting tattoos of furry little animals either (you know who you are).

I did have purple and blue hair at some points back in the day. I liked the purple, it looked pretty cool. I just get tired of the same ole crap. I have learned over the years that being the “wild’ friend has cause some misconceptions about my travels as well. I have been the blame for many o friends little escapades. Too many to count in fact. Some of my dear friend’s significant others will not let them travel with me because they have managed to blame their wild streaks on me. I really don’t go looking for trouble….I would rather sit on the beach and drink a margarita. I am all for going out and having fun, but I don’t want to spend the night in jail. Extremely inconvenient.

 

I would say it is time to fess up to your own wild streaks……..but I have a reputation to uphold of course. I am still no goodie-2-shoes. But neither are you. Unless you're Martha Freakin Stewart. And you're not. She's hardcore. You're not. Quit pretending.

 

Cheers & beers!!!!

Why your diet isn't working

Everyone wants that magic pill or super secret on how to get skinny with zero effort while being able to eat whatever you want. Yes, you bet your ass I am one of those people too. So I will give you a super secret as to why your diet is not working……….portion control DOES NOT WORK. I will go into scientist mode and explain why. It is WHAT you are eating that is creating the issue here. For instance….I can eat an entire pizza made on a whole grain crust with kalmata olives, roasted peppers, roasted egg plant, tomatoes, grilled mushrooms, and lemon shavings, for about 300-400 calories. YOU (think weightwatchers member here) can eat 1 small slice of pepperoni pizza from pizza hut for the same calories. Guess who will get hungry in 20 minutes? Not me. You will get frustrated, annoyed, and finally give in to eating ½ of the whole pizza because the pleasure that the fat-salt-sugar combination gives you is too hard to pass up. I can eat w whole pan of vegan lasagna and still not clock in a fraction of the calories as your “splurge” meal of a small hamburger and small fries from McDonalds. I will be bursting at the seams with my meal. Ok, I would never be able to eat even a fourth of the tray of my vegan lasagna before I am about to bust a gut. But I will feel like a million bucks after my meal while you fell like you just lubed your insides with Crisco.

 

Guys…I have been there. I have tested this theory many times over. Sure Weightwatchers will help you loose weight, but you will still feel deprived. Even with your splurge meals. There is a reason why that company makes so much money……because you are addicted to the “plan”.  It isn’t really a lifestyle change, although they try to push that theory. A diet, is a diet, is a diet. It isn’t designed for you to be able to kick the plan and go it alone and be successful on your own. Do you want to count points/calories/carbs  for the rest of your life? Trust me on this. I have tried every diet on the damn planet with no lasting results and damage done to my body.

 

You can follow a plant-based whole foods lifestyle for the rest of your life. Will it be easy…..hell no. will you have to count anything again…..nope. Will you get full on ALL of your meals and still loose weight and save your heart……you bet. Will you need to depend on a site that you have to pay for, for the rest of your life……not a chance. I canceled my WW account for the last time last week. Never again.

 

I have noticed an annoying issue when at work that is counter productive to my weight loss efforts. I get really hungry around 5ish and it makes me want to go crazy on some not so healthy foods. I think I need to add more to my lunch so I can have an afternoon snack. By the time I make it home I want to chew my arm off. Not good.

30 Days & 30 Nights

30 Days and Nights

Day 1:

Ok I love that movie. And I am going to do that same thing.  But instead of giving up sex and all, I am giving up all foods not made at home (eating out, processed foods, etc), damn it (I am still man-vegan so like that would really matter right now anyways). Now I don’t really practice Lent, but I will do my thang in honor of the movie. Run with it!!! Hey, at least I will save me some money. Yeah I know I am like 2 weeks behind but I really don’t give 2-shits.

On another note…..the Oscars. I did enjoy Seth McFarland hosting. He was pretty tame from his usual stuff but there are always those that like to whine about it (critics that like to call themselves “writers”).  You know….I wish I could sit on my ass and just trash anything and everything and call myself a “writer”. Oh wait…….I have a real job!! Better yet…I have a blog….I can call myself a “writer” too. Sweet!!!

 Cheers & beers!!!

Today's Mission

So I need to find some compression capris. Like yesterday. Yes I will attempt jogging (hell just froze over). Although I bike to and from work, I feel that I need to be doing more. I cancelled my gym membership because I haven't been in almost a year. No sense in wasting my money. I have some weights at home anyways. Plus, lifting my own weight will sure-as-shit give me some Jillian Michael's arms in no time.


I found some compression pants on Amazon but I need to try them on. I will head over to Dick's sporting goods after work to check them out. If they fit I will get them from amazon. No sense in paying full price for stuff. I have some time since it is still kinda cold outside. I will don the capris until my legs don't look like damn tree trunks. Putting on the compression shorts at this point is laughable. I did con my mom into getting me some from the gap but they are a bit small. Maybe when the weather gets a bit warmer they will be fine (and my thunder thighs are not making it difficult to fit). I don't want to exchange them and a few months down the road they are too big. The whole point of the compression pants is to have them tight enough so the "fluff" doesn't jiggle (that whole thing about when all of the fat on your body has to obey the rules of gravity following your foot hitting the pavement).

On another note.......there is a plant based nutrition certificate at Cornell that I would like to do. It looks really interesting but I don't have the $$$ to swing it right now. Taking donations in case anyone is wondering. Ha! No really.

Have an awesome weekend you crazy people.

Cheers & beers!!

Well....what had happened was.......

There is an article on Yahoo today about why we are addicted to junk food. It is a VERY broad and short piece but really doesn’t cover much of the stuff I already know. I mean, I have been preaching this crap for years. Phillip Morris used to own craft foods. Need I say more? Food companies spend more money on trying to make their foods addictive then they spend on advertising. So let’s get real here……..if you were a CEO of a company you want more people to eat your stuff and continue to buy it. Not rocket science here. And they all know that the junk causes heart disease, obesity, cancers, etc. I would like to say that if I was in that position I would do things differently, but…………probably not. Why……..to pay the mortgage. Yeah I went there. And now I will step off my soap box. You can read the Yahoo article here. I actually did a paper on this last year when I was working on my pre-reqs for the nutrition program. My professor said that was the only A he has given all year and I should be an investigative reporter.  That would be great but those of you that know me would agree that I would make some scary enemies doing that and would probably end up with a price on my head. Hahaha. No really. I don’t back down from that sort of crap and sticking it to “the man” would be just too much fun. And again…..to pay the mortgage. Well no, I just like pissing people off. Perhaps I should have gone to law school?

 

Now I can speak from experience of the addiction to junk food. Not so much the sweet stuff, but give me a bag of Cheetos and it’s all over.  But an hour later…..I feel like total shit and the blood sugar is high as a kite. The next morning……still feel like shit and my blood sugar is horrible. But I still eat the stuff. The same goes for popcorn and bacon. Mmmmmm bacon.

So for the past 2 weeks I have been eating like crap. To call me a binge eater would just about nail it. I do ok for breakfast and sometimes lunch. But when dinner rolls around…….all bets are off. Just a few things that I have stuffed down my pie hole:

KFC  about 6 pieces of chicken, mac & cheese, mashed potatoes, etc.

2 large pizzas from camellis with gorgonzola and prosciutto

2 order of garlic cheese bread from camellis

Taco bell-mexican pizza and 3 tacos

Papa johns- ¼ order of cheese sticks and 3 slices bbq pizza

McDonalds #12

2 trips to Zestos for hotdog with all the junk and tots

½ bag of each- cheetos, cheese puffs, Doritos, and pork skins

4 trips to subway for foot long crab salad with 2 bags o chips

 

Yes there is a “this is what falling off the wagon looks like” picture somewhere. And no, I didn’t eat the whole pizzas. I throw the rest out. Total waste of money. To say that I didn’t follow my plant strong vegan eating is putting it lightly. So this morning my blood sugar was horrid from the papa johns last night. By the time I got to work and was thinking about breakfast (I did ride my bike today. Holla!!) my body has just refused to eat any more junk. The thought of junk food made my stomach turn. Whole Foods never sounded so damn good than it does right now. I settled for some scrambled eggs with a crap ton of veggies in there with a slice of wheat bread. I am feelin a bit better. But that might be the caffeine. Ha!!  So back on track today. I will go to Whole Foods for dinner tonight. The vegan chili they have at the bar is freakin awesome!!

 

So here is another problem that I run into often……I tend to waste food. I buy a crap ton of fruits and veggies and then I don’t eat them. They end up going bad. I have the best intentions of eating them but end up going for the junk. I get the fresh stuff from the farmers market and it is damn cheap too. I save a good bit of money. But then it goes to waste anyways. Perhaps it might be a good idea to just buy enough for 2 days at a time. And that would mean shopping at Whole Foods a lot. Don’t hate. I live right next door to one. It might cost a bit more but probably no more than the food I have been wasting. I can still get the non perishables from the market for dirt cheap. I am tired of my frig being stuffed to the max though. No I don’t mind walking to get groceries every 2 days, it burns calories, and keeps my kitchen in better shape too. I do go right past Trader Joes on my way home so that is an option as well. I just hate having to find space on my bike for it. I will let yous guys know how it goes.

I was pondering starting to run. Well lets be honest, it will be more like a jog, ok really just a foot to foot bounce to minimize the horror of all of my "fluff"  (lets get real......the extra 70 pounds of the above menu) being pulled down by gravity. I am on the hunt for some serious compression pants to prevent that horror of all horrors. If you know of any that are awesome please let me know.

 

Cheers & beers!!!!

Hey girl........

Ok, I am super tired of the cold weather. Oh yes. My morning bike rides are getting slightly annoying. Not only do I have to put on 3 layers of clothes, but the cold air makes my nose run like a faucet. I have to carry a bunch of Kleenex with me every day just for my ride. I am looking forward to the warm weather where I can just put on my bike shorts and a tank top and call it a day. And yes, I will be biking in the horrible heat too. That crazy chick riding down the street in her bathing suit……..that’s me!!! Holla!!

 So on that note….. I will leave you with this little gem……

Ahhhhh Valentine's Day

Ahhhhhh  Valentine’s Day……..gag me with a spoon. If you love this horse squeeze then run with it. Yeah flowers and all that are great (I prefer white tulips myself) but this day is just too much pressure for, well, mostly the dudes. Some guys love the stuff, most just start shaking in fear of the day. I would rather go out for wings and beer myself (or a cheeseburger, with bacon, tacos, cheese dip, you get the idea). But I am more of a laid back sort of chick. If Atlanta still had a hockey team, going to a game on Vday would be awesome (and of course there would be hotdogs, peanuts, and beer. Oh and I am the coolest girlfriend EVER!!). I think I may have a junk food addiction here. Yep? Yeah probably.  I don’t like added stress over a retarded holiday, I have enough of that as it is. So yeah my valentines day will be spent hanging with one of my dear (smartass) friends laughing over wings and beer. Sweet!! Not really “plant strong” or vegan but I will let you know when I give a shit. Oh the Vortex has an awesome veggie burger drenched in wing sauce. That might be a better idea. Yay for fried pickles, and beer of course. Some days I think I should find a 12 step program or something, but I have a 2 drink limit so I think I am safe here. Kinda.

 

On another note…….a special thanks to KFC. Why do you ask? Because I gave into a craving last night and was immediately reminded why I hardly eat that shit in the first place. I don’t have the gilt thing for what I eat, I just feel like total ass after eating the junk. Sometimes I need to be reminded of why I should not eat the stuff. I really think I should have hurled it like my stomach was trying to do. I would have felt 10 times better. And no, I am not trying to tack on bulimia here. Sometimes my stomach really wants to reject the really greasy junk. I should just let it, and fix a veggie pita after.

 

So that’s it for today. 2 posts in a week…..feel special. If you have any funny vday stories feel free to share. And those of you that love this day go get your groove thing on. Bow chicka bow wow. Yeah I went there. Run with it!!!

 

Cheers & beers!!!!!

35 years review....warning...rants ahead.....

I turned 35 last week. Yep, 35. Holy shit-balls. So I thought I would do a little review of the whole 35 thing. I did graduate from UGA (holla!!), but with a psychology degree (kicking myself in the ass for that one). Let’s just say that degree has not helped me in any way at ALL. But hey, at least I have a degree. I have been a type 1 diabetic for 30 years and have not had a bad A1C in that time. Sweet!!! 

 

But here comes the negative (what you thought I would spare you the depression rants? Not!!). In short I am 35; fat, single, pretty much broke, and have a job that makes me want to do a swan dive off the parking deck. I thought I would have been married with at least 1 kid at this point (yeah I just said kid, me, hell just froze over). I was married, then divorced, yadda yadda yadda. No, am really not all that mad about my single status. I chalk my dating/married experiences up to valuable learning. For example, I know when you guys are lying, every time, without fail. I appreciate a good guy more than I did back in the day. I don’t waste my time with douche bags that not good for me. I think I did too much of the whole dating guys that just happened to be there or interested, and see how that little gem turned out? Like a horse kick in the ass, thats how.  Now not all of the dudes that I have dated have been total asshats, there were a few good guys (and I mean a FEW). Before you wingnuts start using the “bitter” word, keep in mind that this is just the plain ole truth here (say “bitter” one more time bitch, but get a dictionary and read the definition before using the word first). So since the dating ways that I have been using have not been working, so its time to try something different (like dating a former frat boy. Hell just froze over again. I avoided that little group like the plague because of the whole “meathead” mentality).

 

One day I will meet the perfect guy (for me that is). But I would rather wait for that guy than settle any day of the week. Amen to that shit. No, I am not bitter. In the words of Charlotte  “I have been dating since I was 15. I am exhausted!!! Where is he?!?!?!?!”. I am exhausted. Coffee might help take the edge off that one.

 

As far as the fatty……workin on that shit. Biking to work, went “plant strong”, and keeping the popcorn and bacon addiction in check.

 

The job. Every morning when I get to the door I have an Office Space moment when looking at the door handles and I wonder how in the hell did I get to this shit hole point in my life. So looking to exodus to something better. Hopefully on the west coast. Atlanta kinda sucks big harry balls and then some. But hey if you know of something feel free to let me know.

So that is my little depression rant for today. Holla!!!

Cheers & beers !!!!

 

**And of course, if you are going to bitch about my rants...try posting a useful comment instead.

Nothing new really

So what’s new with everyone? Same ole stuff here mostly. I thought I would do an update on my transition to a plant based way of eating. I was on vacation last week so let’s just say I really didn’t eat any veggies, or fruit, or anything remotely healthy during that period. And I don’t beat myself up over it or really care all that much because I don’t do that 24/7. It was just a few days and then back on track. But it was a learning experience because my energy was zapped and I really didn’t feel all that well while eating that junk. I have been back to my normal plan since Sunday and I feel 10 times better. And what did I do on vacation…..nada. I sat on my ass and caught up on my movies, shows, and books. I did go out and do stuff a bit as well. But it was wonderful just not having to do anything really.

I did clean up my apartment a bit so I wasn’t a complete lazy ass. Oh I did see the movie Warm Bodies….hilarious. Go see it. I haven’t been on my bike since last Tuesday so when the rain stops it should be a super fun ride to work. Yippee!!

 

Valentine’s Day is this week……gag me with a spoon. I have never been a fan of this ridiculous holiday, even when I wasn’t single. It’s just too much pressure to me so much more romantic on one day of the year. Would rather go out for wings and beer, add some blue cheese and veggie stick in there and I am super happy. If you love V-day then go ahead a run with it. Feel free to send me some flowers if you feel so inclined to share the red and pink festivities. Holla!!

 

The Saboteur

So here is an update on my plant based eating. All is going well until I get lazy. I work some crazy hours so I really don’t have a lot of time to cook stuff when I get home. Oh but I make time to watch Primeval, mind you. Yes, I have strayed from my healthy foods for a few meals. And no, I don’t beat myself up about those meals or get depressed. That is a vicious cycle that leads to more “this is what falling off the wagon looks like” photo days. So I eat crap for a meal, so what, there is room for improvement on the next one. Plus, eating junk makes me feel like hell, so I tend to eat better the next meal anyways. But I find that when you eat junk you seem to crave more of it. That lovely little mix of salt, fat, and sugar (in my case probably more salt, and then more salt) sends the pleasure chemicals in your brain into overdrive. Kinda like a heroin addict I suppose. Same concept applies to the chemical laden junk food. If you eat a lot of processed chemical laden junk and then go off cold turkey, you can have actual withdrawal symptoms. Yes I have tested this theory on myself before, the jittery feeling, inability to focus, etc. I haven’t really experienced that stuff with this transition, probably because I eat some “treats” every once in a while.

 

So in an effort to keep successful with my new healthy lifestyle, I have to implement some new habits the next few days.

1.       Clean up the kitchen. I am super lazy about this one. A clean kitchen is better to stick to eating healthy.

2.       Put away dishes when they are clean and load dirty ones. Lazy about this too.

3.       Don’t leave dirty dishes in the sink. You don’t even want to see the state of my kitchen right now.

4.       Make weekly menus with shopping lists.

5.       When the groceries get home, break down items into the menu meals.

6.       Put together ingredients/spices for meals.

7.       Cut up any veggies/fruits for menu meals.

8.       Put together all items for meals and label. This way when I get home everything is ready to cook.

 

I think these ideas will help eliminate a lot of time consuming prep work during the week in just 1-2 hours on the weekend. Which means more time for sleep (ok really more time for my shows AKA The Saboteur).


And I feel it is my civic duty to tell everyone that the Jack Daniels beef jerky stick tastes like ass. No, I really don't know what ass tastes like, but I am sure that is it. Disgusting. So just do yourself a favor and don't deviate from the Slim Jim.